Monday Manderings ~ Birthday Parties!!

A lot of parents' groan when it comes to planning a birthday party for their child. A lot of thinking and planning has to go into it. Who to invite, what's the theme, will there be decorations and if so what kinds, what about food, how much, ughhh!!!! Most of the time before the big day is finally here, parents' are frustrated and gritting their teeth hoping the day is just right for their child. Speaking from experience, your child could care less about all those logistics, they are just happy to be having a party and it's their birthday! What more could they really care about?

Considering the fact that we have a birthday coming up next month, I thought this would be a good topic for my Monday Manderings. Okay, it's really not mandering.....I do actually have a topic, but that's okay, we can just go with the flow for now.

Our Macie will be turning 4 this year and I really want to do something special for her. I want to have an actual party. With balloons, a decorations and cake and some kiddie foods and goodie bags, and an extensive guest list that would include everyone that's part of her family to the famous Just Bieber....well not really, but he's popular and my 9-year-old adores him, so I threw him in there. But the truth is, I can't afford such a big party for her and besides, she doesn't have any friends as she doesn't go to preschool. But that's okay, she has 6 other siblings to join in on her party, a few of their friends, my son's girlfriend, Hubs and I have a few friends....ugh the guest list has to get cut down, but who do we cut out?

To begin with, if we are to invite siblings friends, then it can only be one friend a piece and that would only count for the older ones. Our guest list just went from 9 to 12 in a matter of seconds. Inviting our friends is a bit more tricky as most of them have at least 2 or more children, but hey, all we have to do is count the kids right? So, if we invite our friends we can add about 8 kids there, we're now up to 20.....see how fast that list can grow? So let's think in terms of what's the most expensive.

Probably food......but kids don't eat a lot at parties. All they care about is the cake! That's the honest truth and every parent knows it. If you really want to make the parent's happy, make up your own platters of lunch meats, cheeses and some crackers. If the parent's complain, tell them next year you'll do a bring your own dish party, that should shut them up for a while. Juice would be about the only thing I would offer. Soda and cake......forget it! Way too much sugar for a bunch of kids at YOUR home!

Decorations do not have to be elaborate. You can actually make a lot of them at home with some cardstock, construction paper, computer, markers, ect.....balloons are pretty cheap and if you want to add in some helium, you can always rent a tank, much cheaper than having the party stores do it for you. Next you'll need some ribbon for the balloon, that's pretty inexpensive too and some plates, napkins, utensils and you are all set. You really don't HAVE to go with the fancy plates, but if you wanted to and your budget allowed for it you can. And those bouncy houses? Why?? So a child can get hurt and you can be held liable? Unless you have every parent sign a waiver, you can really pass on this!

How about games, well....you can always have your party at a park. This might cost a little bit of money, but then the kids can play while you hang out with your family and friends. Or you can do the traditional games of pin the tail on the "whatever character you use" and musical chairs, or you can ditch the games all together.

I found some great ideas here:Birthday Party Ideas. These are for little girls, but I'm sure you could search around their site and find some info on boys' as well.

Invitations can be bought cheaply or you can make them at home if you wish. A computer program and some cardstock is all you'll need. facebook.com has an Invite to Event section now, so you could use this feature instead of sending out mass invitations to people. However you plan your child's birthday party, remember it's about your child first, your budget second and everyone else last. It's not about being the coolest kid on the block, or the most entertaining birthday party ever! One rule I've always heard, if you have a 4-year-old then no more than 4 kids should be at their party. I have never abided by this rule but I don't think it's a terrible one, especially if your budget is tight.

Oh and set a budget and don't go over it, no matter who says what to you! You know what you can afford, they don't!

One more place you might want to check out is partycity.com. They can be a bit pricey the larger your party is, but remember, you only need to buy themed products for kids. The adults can eat off of regular plates with regular forks, or worse comes to worse, they can use their fingers!

Management

I think a lot of what I learned about managing a large family can help many of the smaller families as well. We as parents are always looking for new ways to make our lives easier, aren't we? That said, if you walked through my house right now, you'd probably wonder if I was talking out my tush here. But the condition of my home is for another time :)

Having 1 child can seem like it would be an easy job, but in actuality it's no different then having several, especially if one or both of the parents work outside the home. Even if one works at home, there are still demands that must be met each day or soon you're home will fall apart and it will look like, well.....mine right now.

Let's take a look at some of the things I have used over the years and see if any of them may be useful for you.

I set up a weekly cleaning schedule. I like to use the one here: Justmommies.com

It helps me as the mom stay on track and when I'm working it can help Hubby to stay on track too.

I also implement everyones help! All my kids make messes and big ones! I often find at least one child who has left a trail of things behind them, creating a huge mess and they think someone else is going to clean it up. That doesn't happen. I refuse to clean up after anyone who isn't willing to clean up after me. Hubby has a bad habit of doing this. When he cleans, he cleans up for everyone. Not me, I wait until everyone is home and I make them all pitch in and help. If I did it myself, it would take me hours to get done what needs to be done. Instead, by having help, it doesn't take more than an hour to get things straightened up.

Have chores for the kids. I suggest printing out and making up your own chores. Not every chore is going to fit for your family. You can also make ones yourself using a spreadsheet already on your computer. These chores can be something as simple as personal hygiene for the younger kids all the way up to cleaning out the garage for the older kids.

We live in a time where most kids spend all their time either playing or doing school work. My kids have between 15 minutes to 2 hours worth of homework a night. We feel bad fitting chores into their schedules when they have no time to be kids. That's why during the week, I don't ask much from the kids. Hubs and I are both home, so it makes it a bit easier. But weekends are different. Saturday and Sunday mornings are mine. They need to use that time to help get the house in order for the next week. Weekdays are busy for us and it's easy for things to fall apart quickly.

Routines! When you and the kids can count on something happening predictably, it can be easier to fall back into that routine if a crisis should arise. With 7 kids, we end up with lots of colds, boo boos and other issues almost constantly. Knowing who has to do what, when, helps everyone else stay focused until things return to normal.

One of these days I'll give you an example of our routine. It's not really exciting, but hopefully it'll give you an idea of how best to help your own family.

Plan! What I mean is, keep a calender of events coming up for the next month. We have a calendar up on the fridge. I write in all the appointments coming up for the following month and anyone who has plans needs to put it on the calendar so we know what to expect.

Meal Plan! This will make your life a thousand times easier, especially if both parents do work. It let's you know what you're going to have for dinner, what you need to get out of the fridge or freezer and what you need to buy from the grocery store. Remember, use those coupons and buy only what's on sale! Plan your meals around your grocery store's sale flyer.

And lastly, don't stress! The laundry will get done, the dishes will get done, the cob-webs will probably go unnoticed if you happen to have company over. The one thing that you have to make sure you do, spend time with your kids. Parks are great places for kids and you to burn off energy. Cuddle with them and read to them often. Let kids be kids, not your own personal workers!